Fail for Jon

The nightmare is over, and it’s about damn time, now they can officially go away. Earlier today it was announced their divorce was finalized, and momma Kate came out on top, and Jon got what he deserved, not much. Kate got to keep the house, the kids, she has primary custody, and most of the money, and Jon’s ass got served with child support, which according to TMZ the payments are  in the five-digit figures, and as we all know he’s no longer allowed to work in the media unless TLC approves it. Jon Gosselin is in deep shit, we almost feel sorry for this douche. Kate released a statement saying… SEE MORE INSIDE→

We hadn’t heard anything important about the king of the douches in a good while, not  that there ever was, and if your pissed thinking, ‘I thought we had gotten rid of his roly poly ass’. Well we have, almost, but not before TLC sends him off with a swift kick in the ass, and takes all his pocket change. Turns out TLC won the lawsuit they had filed a couple months ago against Jon for breaking his contract with them, and doing all sorts of crap they didn’t approve of, and making them look bad. But the main reason had to be for taking his kids from them, TLC said in a statement, “We are pleased with the Court’s ruling today. The Court has validated our view that Mr. Gosselin has a valid, binding contract and that he has breached it repeatedly“. SEE MORE INSIDE→

Since he has no kids and his reputation is already at the point of no return, here’s Jon Gosselin, and guess what he is not giving up on being famous. Team Kate is gonna have to suck it and put up with this giant bag of douche until, he has another epiphany. Next time we hear about Jon, it better have something to do with TLC in court suing the pants off his ass, literally he better be free ballin’ …

In very important news, Jon Gosselin was photographed doing some yoga, and we gotta know all about it, next we’ll see pictures of Jon brushing his teeth, taking a dump, stopping by at Costco to purchase boxes of condoms, and maybe just maybe we’ll see him fall into a big hole leading to nowhere. Actually there are pictures of Jon at the barber shop today, but these are way more entertaining. It’s like he was born to be in front of the camera, what would our lives be without this douche to entertain us with his daily activities.

Now we get what he’s doing, everything he asks for, is the opposite of what he wants, you know like 5 year olds. He said he doesn’t like the attention from the media, but yet he’s a fame-whore, so if you ever get a chance to see him, just head on over there and kick him in the balls, if he says to stop…

Looks like Jon is getting in touch with his spiritual side since he already has a SOUL patch on his chest

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Entertainment Tonight had Hailey Glassman on the show to hear all about Jon Gosselin’s mantrums, for some reason every time these two are on this show it’s always about nothing, but it’s entertaining seeing these two come up with crap to cover their asses for being Hollywood’s asswipes. What’s more entertaining is the host Mary Hart, holy robot looking bitch, what is wrong with that lady, that’s probably what happens after interviewing so many idiots. SEE MORE INSIDE→

Even Halloween can’t escape media-whoring phenomenon Jon Gosselin, his whore move of the day was his costume. He may have gone too far this time, it looks like some hair plugs might be coming off, but it’s the price he’s willing to pay. If he was trying to make some kind of statement with this costume he failed, we would have gone with a giant condom, actually he needs no costume, if he hasn’t noticed half of America if going as him this Halloween.

So as we all know Jon dumped the “love of his life” his gold-digger Hailey Glassman, and we’re all dying to know who was to blame, was it Hailey and her terrible acting or was Jon eating all the twinkies in their NY apartment. It was neither, Rabbi Shmuley Boteach has came out and said he was the one who told Jon to leave Hailey saying, “It is unacceptable to be in a relationship when he is still married and has to take care of kids who are hurting. It is not a healthy relationship.” Rabbi Shmuley is Jon’s new spiritual guide, he ditched his partner in fame-whoring Michael Lohan.

The face NOT even a mother would love

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Right now the couple is saying their taking a break, but sources close to Hailey say that shits over and it all went down right after she did the interview with The Insider. Hailey played it out for the camaras blaming Jon for emotionally abusing her, and throwing “mantrums”. Right now Jon has said he’s concentrating on his spiritual self, and then if there’s time he’ll go watch after his kids, but for now Jon needs to focus on himself. Being the media whore he is he went after MJ’s old friend Rabbi Shmuley Boteach, who will probably do a show later on with Jon about spiritual Jon, and the big plot will be about, how Jon found Jeebus on a piece of bread.

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